June 29, 2008

• The words escape me now that Ive sat down to write

  I want to scream at you, beg you, love you, hate you, touch you, run from you

  Twist the knife a little further in my heart

  When you answer the phone and fill me up, buttercup

  You never call when you say you will

  And yet its you I want... the things Ive considered

  Something I could never do, a betrayal, but if I did itd be for you

  And you might want nothing from me

  Do I smother you? And you wonder why my heart is best on two people

  Otherwise, see, I will shine the sun on you until u burn

  And wonder why you let go as my firey grip tightens

  I try so hard not to call out desperately, but uve robbed me

  Of my sanity, my solace, my peace, my direction, my obsession

  Is it so easy to win my heart? I barely know you

  But what u awakened in me with that womans touch

  You know, its cruel to give a starving man bread crums

  But you did, and I ache for more, scream for more, beg for more, bleed for more

  And more than your touch, ur smile, ur strength, ur certainty, ur power, ur prowess, ur fragility....

  I recognize you! From my deepest desires, wildest dreams, oldest longings

  Even my stories of a blessed future and home speak of you

  So could I betray and give up my home?

  You have me teering on the edge of destoying myself

  But you tell me to be true, and I breathe

  Where were you all that time I screamed for you?

  Waiting til I found myself needing more than I dreamed?

  Cant you be a part of what I have built?

  Throw me away and toss the key

  At least then I will not hope...

  But no, please, to loose you...

  I would follow obediantly the path to your heart

  But that path has strayed from me

  And as I blunder in this forest of thorns, will you guide me home?

  Hear me please, and send that blue bird to lead me home

  For the torment alone is all I have, hope

  Until you make your move

  My heart cries again tonight

  • 10:03 pm
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